A transcription of an interview broadcast on Thursday, 15 May 2025.

Hannah

Nicholas is with us on The Book Show to talk about Jessica, a story of a young woman showing up on the doorstep of a middle-aged property developer and blowing up his world by revealing truths he had no idea of. It's a semi-autobiographical family drama where he draws affectionately on his experiences and friendships as a young actor in London. Welcome to The Book Show, Nicholas.

Nicholas

Thank you, Hannah. It's a great pleasure to be here. The book means a lot to me because it's semi-autobiographical. It’s set in 2019, but much of the action takes place 20 years earlier, when the key character, Harry, is still an impressionable young man.

Although he’s based on me, Harry is only 45, and I'm a bit older than that. So I've had to play around with the dates. The real dates are different, but we’re alternating between 1999 and 2019. So we've got Harry, a young graduate in London, toying with a full-time career as an actor and a more lucrative career in the City of London, which is eventually where he ends up. But it's the acting world that's interesting, because that's where he meets people who are going to change what is ultimately his future, but without him knowing it at the time.

The dedication on the sort of inside front page of Jessica is a line from Hamlet, which reads, "We know what we are, but know not what we may be". My first novel was The Journey, and, although we're not here to talk about it, I mention it because it's relevant. If we apply this quote to The Journey, what happens is you have a dream family who have everything. I mean, it's a family that everyone would want to belong to, and then there’s a tragic accident, and like a house of cards, the family falls to pieces. Simon, the main character in that book, doesn't give up. He gives everything to recreate what he had, but in doing so, he has to make some tricky moral choices, which have attracted mixed comments from readers. So here we're talking about moral relativism and how life and the future are no more than a game of chance.

Now that's The Journey. I mention it here because, of course, Jessica is about how our lives are affected by the past. This could be in two ways. It could be something we did years ago, perhaps something we weren't too proud of, which comes back to haunt us. Or it could be our background, where people move on, change environment, become successful, and then wonder why they suffer from impostor syndrome and struggle to come to terms with who they are.

In the prologue in Jessica, which was taken from a scene in the middle of the book, Harry’s in Hyde Park, looking out over the Serpentine, and he asks himself, "Is the past a part of us that refuses to be left behind, or is it another country that's forgotten as we travel onto new shores?" I think that's a question that a lot of us ask of ourselves. To what extent are we the hostages of our past? Or to what extent can we move on and say, "Well, the past is the past? Let's not let yesterday spoil tomorrow?"

But the other point that needs to be made is that Jessica is a family drama and also a romantic one. It's a love story, and it's about fulfilment.

Harry is with his three friends on his birthday. They're having a dinner party—just the four of them. They're all very different, but they're all very successful, and they're all completely unfulfilled. It's only when Jessica turns up the following day on Harry's doorstep. "Knock, knock. Who's there? The past. The past you've been trying to escape for 20 years." That changes everything, not just Harry's life, but indirectly, Jessica changes the lives of his friends, who become fulfilled and go on to live the lives they had only ever dreamt of.

But it's not that simple, because to get to that point of fulfilment, they have to deal with a complicated world filled with sex workers and sexual diversity. This is where the historical, 20-year-earlier, story comes in. Harry and the main characters have to live their lives now, but deal with what happened in the past. "What should be my reaction now? I thought I'd forgotten about that." And so their lives do change very, very drastically.

One of the interesting things about this book is that, unlike in The Journey, where everybody is completely made up and a total work of fiction, in Jessica, every character, apart from Jessica herself, has been inspired by real people. Most of them are still alive today. So it is a story that's very, very close to my heart, and it's something that I thoroughly enjoyed writing.

I would say, though, after talking about Shakespeare and the shadows of the past, it is ultimately a light-hearted work of commercial fiction. I love the idea of an onion. A reader can go as far into the meaning of what’s going on, and some of it is pretty challenging. Very challenging, even. Or they can deal with it as a pleasant read on a long train journey, and it will give them a lot of enjoyment. So I'm looking forward to seeing how it performs in the market. Since we published on the 28th of March, we've had a lot of sales on Kindle, but fewer in paperback. But we're working on this, and it'll be interesting to see how it turns out.

Hannah

Yeah, so can I ask you a bit more about Jessica? If all the other people are based on reality, real people, and real situations, how or why did you come up with the character of Jessica?

Nicholas

Because this is revealed in the first chapter of the book, I don't think it can be too much of a spoiler to give it away. Effectively, Jessica is the daughter I never knew I had who turns up 20 years later saying, "Hi Dad. Do you fancy a family?"

Hannah

So I was gonna say, is that part true? So that part isn't true because you said you are not Harry?

Nicholas

Well, I suppose I do kind of flip in and out of character. But I think Jessica, well, to the best of my knowledge, never existed, although it’s not impossible. But of course, Jessica, having come onto the scene, wants to create a new life for herself. Harry is an initially reluctant father, you might say, but he will have to be part of that. So, of course, the book, a lot of the book, is struggling with how she tries to go about that; what her objectives are. Why is she after this wealthy guy? Is she after this cash? Is she lonely? Does she need a father? What's happened to her mother, who we don't see until much later in the book? I do have two daughters of her age, amusingly, but Jessica isn't based on either of them.

You know, the sex work and sexual diversity side of things is interesting. In the 20-year-earlier bit of the book, where we flip between the present and the past, people had relationships they moved away from, tried to deny, or tried to forget. And of course, 20 years later, Jessica's on the scene. Not only is she trying to bring Harry back to reality, to what his life could have been and what he should do to profit from that, but his friends are looking at their own lives and thinking, "Is this where I wanted to be? What about that young man I was hanging out with 20 years ago before marrying a woman?" And so there are lines like that which are quite interesting, and I think would make a lot of people sit up and think about themselves.

Hannah

Does the sex work come into it when the the men are younger? Is that what they're sort of getting up to?

Nicholas

No, not at all. Quite the opposite. And this is where I have to be very careful about spoilers. The sex work comes from, first of all, people not knowing who they were or who their partner was, and then discovering later that their partner had a secret life they were unaware of. And then we have the present-day situation. I mean, they're not out chasing prostitutes around Paddington, but one of the guys, who's unhappily married and seeking to find himself, experiments with male and female prostitutes before realising who he truly is. Reviewers who've read the book all say these issues are treated with great respect and sensitivity. This is not a raunchy story of “ladies of the night”. Not at all. It's more about people seeking to work out who they are.

Hannah

Did you enjoy writing the book? Was it, was it fun? Was it challenging?

Nicholas

It was a lot of fun, and it was very challenging.

When I write, I like to set my book out right from the start with an initial synopsis of the chapters and then a detailed synopsis as I get to each chapter. So, at that stage, it's a question of putting the meat on the bones, but the bones are already there, although there were some challenges; some specifically challenging bits.

As I said, the book is not intended to be raunchy, but sex does crop up here and there. And because of the nature of the characters, because of the interaction between the characters, it is very important to show that when people have sex or make love, or however you want to put it, they do so at different times with different people for different reasons. Where somebody is seeking reassurance, for instance, or where somebody else is expressing passion or trying to make babies. So that's very much what lies behind the sex scenes.

When I was about three-quarters of the way through the book, I wondered if I was going about this the right way. I took advice from all over the place, and people said, unless you're writing a work of pornography, which, of course, this isn't, you can pretty much say whatever you like, but you mustn't mention what Kenny Everett used to describe as "the naughty parts". You mustn't mention bits of the body that you wouldn't be comfortable discussing with your family, for instance. So you can say bottom and breast, but you can't say any of the other stuff. So, of course, having realised this, it took me about two days to re-edit the 200 pages or so that I'd already written, taking out every mention of something that could get me into trouble. But there's none of that in there.

The two books, The Journey and Jessica, both show how little control we have over, as Shakespeare said, "what we may be." A lot is going on that is deciding for you, if you like, which direction you’re going to be pushed in.

Hannah

You don't think it's all down to choices, the choices that we make?

Nicholas

I think you're absolutely right in that I have a friend who goes from one disaster to another, and we all say he's just made a series of very bad choices. The difficulty is, of course, that you have to make the right choices, and it's all about, more than anything else, knowing what those choices are. I'm very much involved in an educational charity, where a lot of our work is showing disadvantaged children that they have incredible choices they don't even know about. But if they don't know those choices exist, they won’t be able to take advantage of them. So yes, it is about choices. But, you know, we go through life, and this is the point we make in The Journey, making what we believe are good choices. We go forward, we work hard, we study, and everything else. But if one day we are run over by a bus, it's not going to make much difference. So as I said at the book launch at the Frontline Club in London, life at the end of the day is a game of chance. We can make the best choices. We can improve the odds as much as possible, but we can't be sure about anything. And I think that's the key issue.

Hannah

If people want to get a copy of Jessica, it's out now. It's available on our website, and it's by Nicholas Hill, who we've been chatting with today. Nicholas, thanks so much for joining us.

Nicholas

Hannah, that's been great. Most enjoyable. Thank you.

A Thought-Provoking Read: Jessica by Nicholas Hill

www.womentalking.co.uk

A Thought-Provoking Read: Jessica by Nicholas Hill – Nicholas Hill’s novel Jessica is a gripping and thought-provoking story about family secrets, hidden truths, and the unexpected ways the past can come back to haunt us. Based on real-life experiences, this semi-autobiographical novel dives deep into love, regret, and how our past choices shape our future. Hill, who once worked as a young actor in London, brings a personal touch to the story that makes it feel authentic and relatable.

The book follows Harry, a middle-aged property developer who seems to have it all—except when it comes to love. Just as he’s bracing himself for the end of his latest relationship, a mysterious young woman named Jessica shows up on his doorstep. Her arrival turns his life upside down, forcing him to confront a past he’s tried to forget. But that past still holds secrets that could completely derail his future.

What makes Jessica stand out is how it tackles tricky subjects like sex work, power dynamics, and personal identity with a sensitive and thoughtful approach. Hill doesn’t shy away from the complexities of the sex trade, asking tough questions: Is there a difference between a woman working on the street and one who has regular clients? What about young women financially dependent on older men? And how does all of this connect to self-exploration and struggling with sexuality? These are big topics, but Hill handles them with nuance and care.

Set in London and weaving between past and present, the novel explores love, naivety, and the challenges of truly understanding what’s important in life. Hill’s writing is warm, honest, and easy to connect with, making Jessica an enjoyable yet thought-provoking read. His background in real estate across Europe and Southern Africa adds depth to the story’s setting, while his personal reflections make it emotionally compelling.

Hill himself has said, “When I write, I find myself unpicking the rich tapestry of my own life, and Jessica is a semi-autobiographical family drama. I draw affectionately on my experiences and friendships as a young actor in London and have tried to deal with challenging issues such as sex work and diverse sexuality with respect and sensitivity. I also look nostalgically at my loss of innocence following an idyllic childhood in Snowdonia. Is the past a foreign country it’s best not to visit, or are we hostages to its shadows?”

If you love contemporary fiction that isn’t afraid to ask big questions while still delivering an engaging story, Jessica should be on your reading list.

Poppy Watt

A recommendation from award-winning writer, Clare MacKintosh.

Author looks back to Wirral childhood in new novel set on the peninsula

16th September

By Jamie Bowman@JamieBowman77Community Content Editor

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An author has gone back to his Wirral roots in his new book which will be launched at West Kirby Bookshop.

Nicholas Hill, who works as a  commercial property developer in the South of France, where he lives with his wife, Samantha, and their three young children, has used the peninsula as the setting for The Journey - a novel about "relationships, choices and family and how no one is protected from events beyond our control".

"I was six when my family moved from Snowdonia to West Kirby, and I have fond memories of a childhood sailing on the Marine Lake, playing on Calday Beach and exploring Thurstaston Common," said Nicholas, 63. 

"By the time I left Calday Grange Grammar School, however, I was ready to travel, and after studying at the London School of Economics, I set off to explore the world.

"40 years later, having spent most of my working life in Africa and Continental Europe, I am excited to be reconnecting with the Wirral!"

The Journey is available at the newly opened West Kirby Bookshop, where Nicholas will be hosting a private launch event on Tuesday, September 20, and from Waterstones, WHSmith, Foyles, Blackwell’s and Amazon UK.

Tickets to the launch may be obtained from: [email protected].

Nicholas added: “The idea for writing The Journey came on a family trip to the Lake District when I saw a job vacancy pinned to the front door of a pub.

"My three young children were misbehaving, and I imagined abandoning my life as a loving husband and father to start a new life, free of responsibility in an idyllic rural village.

"After I bought ice-creams, my children’s behaviour improved, but I was still struck by the idea, one of the key elements in my novel. Another is how nothing is ever certain – how our well-laid plans are forever at the mercy of events we can’t control.

"With beautiful settings on the Wirral and in the Lake District and likeable characters, The Journey is an easy read for a Sunday afternoon, the daily commute or a day on the beach.”

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The Journey Nicholas Hill (The Book Guild) 
A fitting title for a holiday read and with some beautiful settings on the Wirral and in the Lake District, this novel by the president of the ESU France Aix-Marseille branch follows the story of car salesman Simon, and what happens when an accident shatters his world.